The Joke thread (NSFW)

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Bob
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Bob » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:56 pm

A guy walks into a bathroom, sits down, and notices three buttons in front of him marked, WW, WA, and ATR. Curiosity gets the better of him so he decides to press WW. Suddenly, warm water sprays up his rear. “Mmmm,” he says to himself. “That was good.” So he presses WA and a jet of warm air dries his backside. “Mmmm. Nice!” So finally he can’t resist pressing the ATR button. The next thing he knows, he is waking up in a hospital ward just as the nurse is entering the room. “Nurse, Nurse! Where am I? What happened?” The nurse replies, “You must have missed the sign to not press the ATR button.” “What does ATR mean exactly?” says the guy. “Automatic Tampon Remover. Your testicles are under your pillow.”

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Tea
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Tea » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:57 pm

:D :D :D :D

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Tea
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Tea » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:57 pm

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."
She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

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Steve
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Steve » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:58 pm

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?

Just look for the fresh prints...

Bob
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Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2015 4:27 pm

Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Bob » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:59 pm

Yesterday I saw a car with a boot sticker, saying, ''I am a Vet, therefore I can drive like an animal!'' It was at that moment that I suddenly realised just how many gynecologists there are on the roads.

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Steve
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Steve » Wed Mar 11, 2015 1:59 pm

I was at a job interview today.

The interviewer said to me, "On your CV, it says that you are a man of mystery."

I said, "That's correct."

He said, "Would you like to elaborate?"

I said, "No."

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Steve
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Steve » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:00 pm

This morning on the way to work I drove into the back of a car, at some lights, whilst not really paying attention.

The driver got out and he was a dwarf.

He said, "I'm not happy."

I replied, "Well, which one are you then?"

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Steve
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Steve » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:00 pm


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Tea
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Tea » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:01 pm

Nice :lol:

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Steve
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Re: The Joke thread (NSFW)

Post by Steve » Wed Mar 11, 2015 2:02 pm

My best friend got mad at me when he caught me sniffing his sisters panties.

It didn't help that they were still on her at the time.

Or that all of her family were there too.

It really made the rest of her funeral awkward....

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